It's the war on fun in Sydney. Went out this morning to my favourite, the Colombian pub, stopped in there just after breakfast at about nine in the morning and what do you know? CLOSED until eleven. So I mosey off to Kings Cross, I sit down at Roy's on Victoria street. I ask them if I can have a beer. NO BEER til midday. Wha... so I have a carrot and apple juice instead and move on. Finally I get to the Empire pub, about the last place I'd usually volunteer to sit in at any time of day or night, the joint of last resort. I order a schooner of Blonde. The tap starts running dry halfway through the pour. So I ask for a bottle of Crown instead. Nothing could possibly go wrong now. The barwench cracks it open successfully, and even gives me the not quite full schooner of Blonde on the house. Small compensation I suppose, considering all that had gone before...then I get in a taxi and head back to Glebe and piss my pants on the way.